How to Write a Message on an Online-Dating Site

The first step to finding a date on a disabled matchmaking service is knowing how to write a killer first message. The kind that will grab their attention, and get them to write back to you.

1. Never send out one word messages like "hi" or "sup?" They are just too short and impersonal. You're making it very hard for someone to write back to you. You will either get a message back "hi", or none at all. You want the conversation to flow, not to stunt it before it has even started!

2. Ask question. Questions are a great way to keep a conversation going, because it allows the person you are messaging to have something to write back to you about. Don't go over-bored and ask a ton of things; you don't want to make them feel like you're playing 21 questions. Just ask a couple so you can get the ball rolling, and get them talking.

3. Start off the message by writing your name: "Hi my name is Susan, I saw your profile..." Don't give them your family name for online safety reasons, but giving them your first name will make you seem more personable.

4. Be personal. Make sure to only message them after you've read their profile, and make sure to slip into the messages things about their profile. For example: "I see that you like to read, I'm reading Into the Wild at the moment, what about you?" In this kind of message you've given them a little personal info about you, shown them you took the time to read their profile, and started up a back-and-forth conversation.

5. Don't make remarks about their physical appearance. Don't write comments like: "I really like you're photo, wanna chat?" You are not only less likely to be messaged back, but you will also make someone feel uncomfortable. Stick to comments about things they have written in their profile, not their profile pic.

6. Always stick to positive language. 

7. Make sure it's not too short, but also not too long. It shouldn't be just two or three words, but you should also not be writing a novel! A paragraph is more than enough for a first message.

8. Keep things light and funny.

9. The conversation shouldn't only be about you. Make sure to incorporate questions for the person you are messaging. You shouldn't write three paragraphs about who you are, and then follow it up with a question. Make sure to keep a balance between talking about yourself, and being interested in the other person.

10. Stay away from copy-pasting generic messages (people can tell it sounds like a template), and never EVER use cliches.

Be nice, honest, and most importantly yourself, that will serve you much better than copy-pasting ready made messages.

Personalizing messages can take a little bit more time, and can get frustrating if you're not getting as many replies as you would have liked. But that said, if you've already made an effort to sign up to a disabled matchmaking service like dating 4 disabled, put the extra effort into the messages you send out. If you're serious about finding someone on an online dating site, you have to work on how you phrase messages, and put some thought into them before clicking the "send" button.

Do People With Disabilities Have Unfair Advantages Over Other People? By: Stepheninleeds

Guest post by: Stepheninleeds

Privileges of having disabilities Do people with disabilities have unfair advantages over other people? It is true to say that most people think that almost all people with disabilities have been granted entitlements & exemptions which they consider to be unjust to them, even excessively advantageous to people with disabilities. This includes such things as the Blue Badge & parking spaces, Welfare benefits, greater priority in council housing, etc. I could spend hours explaining why this is not the case. How can we make people understand that we do not have any advantages, & that we are in fact at a serious disadvantage? 

Blue Badge parking permit- is a myth that if you have a Blue Badge you can park anywhere you wish, for as long as you wish. There are some restrictions when using the Blue Badge; the rules differ from council to council. Yes, it is true that with a Blue Badge you can park, drop off or pickup someone in places which others cannot. But is this unfair to everyone else? The best way to explain this is to use some comparisons. Of course, using comparisons is not ideal in this situation, but it may help some understand better. Perhaps you have suffered a broken leg & found it very difficult to get around, walking from a car park, etc. Consider someone who may not have full use of one or both legs, permanently. We all know what it is like to have a very bad virus that restricts our breathing, causes aches & pains, etc. There are many medical conditions that can have similar, but more serious effects on a person. Some people find it physically impossible to walk more than a few steps, or where walking is extremely difficult & restrictive, and often painful. It can also be the case that such activity can be dangerous. Some people cannot balance, stand for long without falling, or cannot control their legs. Having a Blue Badge does not give us an advantage; it does not even make things equal. We are still at a disadvantage. Having a Blue Badge helps us to function better. Without it, many people would not be able to go to supermarket, into town, shopping centers, the doctor, hospitals for treatment, even to work, etc. 

Yes, many people with disabilities work. Welfare benefits firstly benefits related to disabilities, generally known as disabled benefits. Another myth, is that people who have disabilities are scroungers who claim benefits & live the life of luxury. It is not a luxury having a disability. The benefits we get are there to provide for our needs because of the disadvantages, because of the disability, not for us to live the life of Riley. Disabled benefits are given to help us with the daily activities that others take for granted; this can include help with getting in/out of bed, getting dressed, washing & bathing, going to the toilet, preparing meals, household chores, going shopping, getting to & from doctor/hospital appointments, providing for travel costs related to the disability, supervision, etc. 

So how come we can claim benefits other than disability benefits? These benefits are not just for people with disabilities. Anyone who is on a low income can claim them. Let me remind you that people with disabilities are not rich because we get benefits. There are strict rules on who can claim & how much they will get. It is an incorrect assumption that we all get every benefit & at the full rate. It is a fallacy that we waste this money on expensive cars, luxury food, designer clothes, the latest hi–tech equipment. Next time you consider it to be unfair think about how unfair it is to have disabilities. How unfair it is to have to rely on others to perform personal, and sometimes intimate tasks that we cannot. How unfair it is to face verbal or physical abuse. How unfair it is to be called a cheater, scrounger, liar, lazy? Author Stepheninleeds 

Copyright © Stephheninleeds

This post is a guest-post by: Stepheninleeds 

If you would like to submit a guest-post please email: office@dating4disabled.com or use the contact sheet on the Dating for Disabled site: http://www.dating4disabled.com/pages/5

Wishing you a Great Morning- D4D

Dating for disabled would like to wish you a wonderful day!

If you aren't a dating for disabled member, and would like to register for free, just click on the link to the site: http://www.dating4disabled.com/sign_up

Checking that Your Date Location is Accessible

Dating for disabled is an online matchmaking service for people with disabilities, and as such, you should take it into consideration when choosing a venue for your date (if your date uses a wheelchair that is). The first thing that's important to clear up is: what does wheelchair accessible mean? And how do I know if the coffee-shop/restaurant really is accessible. Because it might be a very embarrassing start to the night to show up for the date, only to discover to your horror, that the place isn't really accessible. 
Obviously, if you are in a wheelchair yourself ,you will know what places are accessible and what aren't, but if you're going on a date with someone who uses a wheelchair, here are some basic questions you should be asking. Note that sometimes it isn't enough to just ask if a place is accessible, because you might get a not very well thought out yes. In which case, don't be afraid to ask a few questions just to double check:

1. Does the place have a ramp as well as stairs? Make sure the waiter hasn't forgotten that one stair at the entrance. If the restaurant is ground level you should be OK.
2. Do they have a bathroom that is suitable.
3. Can you comfortably get from the door to the table (are the tables pushed together so tightly there is no room to get by them). If you are booking a table, be sure to not only ask if the place is wheelchair accessible, but that your table is as well.
4. If your date is showing up by car, make sure that the parking lot has allocated spaces.

Don't be afraid to be annoying on the phone! It's better to drive the person who answers the phone mad for two minutes, than show up with your date and discover they were wrong on the phone. 

Many local organizations for people with disabilities will list on their website the local establishments that are accessible. But just in case, call ahead to ask!

For more disabled matchmaking advice go to our site: www.dating4disabled.com

Is Online-Dating Socially Acceptable?

"Is Online-Dating Socially Acceptable?" Is a question that worries many of us while making the decision whether or not to sign up to an online matchmaking service (disabled or not). We are constantly worried about what will our friends or family think about us if we use online dating. We worry that it makes us look desperate, or pathetic. But let's examine this point for a second. Since social media took over our lives a few years ago, most of our interactions with our friends happen in virtual reality. We have forgone printing out pictures to put in photo albums, in exchange for virtual albums on facebook; because it's easier to share our pictures and lives that way. We make plans to meet up through chat. So if the bulk of our social lives and interactions happen online, then why is it  suddenly taboo or wrong to use a dating service for our love-lives?
The idea behind dating sites is that there are hundreds of people out there that can be a potential matches for us, but we have no way of meeting them. These are people that we don't have any friends in common with, we don't share the same hang-outs or yoga classes with them. They might be the potential love of our life but we will never meet them without the help of the internet.
The amazing thing about online matchmaking services, is that they can help connect us with lots of other people who are looking for the same thing. If you are serious about meeting someone and settling down, you can look for other people who want the same thing. If you would like to meet other people with disabilities, online matchmaking services like dating for disabled can help you make that happen.
People who do not use online dating cling to the saying: "I don't need online dating, I can meet people just fine in real life". But they don't realize that they are missing the point, it isn't always about whether or not you meet other singles in bars or through friends, it's about all of those people you are NOT meeting. All of those people who run in different social circles, or work and live in a part of town you never go. It's about what you're missing out on. Sometimes, serendipity just isn't enough! Sometimes you just have to take matters into your own hands and use an online dating site to meet all of those other people you have no way of running into in a bar.
Whether you are disabled or not, it isn't always easy to meet people to date seriously. Dating sites are just the means to an end, a tool that can help connect you with other singles. Just like you use twitter, facebook and other sites to connect with your friends, why not consider using a dating site to connect with other singles?

For more online dating advice go to our site: http://www.dating4disabled.com/pages/74

Come Register for Dating4Disabled for Free

How Much Does Dating for Disabled Cost?

Dating for disabled is a free disabled matchmaking service: signing up, sending messages, using the blogs and forums is completely free of charge. When we first started dating for disabled in 2005 the service was completely free, but to deal with the costs of storing and running the site we charge a small fee.

The more months you sign up for, the cheaper it is, if you would like more info on subscription fees, please click here: http://dating4disabled.com/user/payment

What do you get for your money?

When you get a paid subscription for the site, you are able to read an unlimited number of messages from other dating4disabled members. Moreover, any other D4D member that you message can read what you sent, irrelevant to whether or not they have a free point.

If you joined an online matchmaking service in order to find love, and you are serious about meeting other disabled singles, you should consider this as an option for you. It will increase your chances of meeting someone to date, and after all, that’s what you signed up for the site to do! The more you message back and forth with other members, the higher your chances of meeting someone and making a genuine connection.

If you would like to sign up for free: http://www.dating4disabled.com/sign_up

Come Connect With Dating 4 Disabled

Dating for disabled is available on every social media platform (for your convenience). So come check out our various social media pages!

Dating4Disabled: www.dating4disabled.com

Our FB: https://www.facebook.com/dating4d

Twitter: https://twitter.com/Dating4D

Pinterest: http://www.pinterest.com/dating4disabled/

Blog: http://admind4d.blogspot.co.il/ 

G+: https://plus.google.com/+Dating4disabledD4D/posts

Topics You should Avoid on a First Date

First dates can be stressful enough without the added stress of actually having to talk to the other person. If you met on an online dating site, like dating 4 disabled, you've probably already got a few conversations under your belt, so in some regards it isn't quite like the classic blind date. But that said, you've never actually talked face to face (unless of course you've already skyped, in which case you're ahead of the game). But talking face to face isn't quite like chatting on a dating site; you don't have as much time to collect your thoughts, and think about your responses. You can carefully construct your words before hitting the"send" button, a privilege you do not have in "reality".

Here are just some ideas for topics of conversation you should probably avoid if you would like to keep things "light" on your first date. The reason for this is the objective is to get to know one another. If you end up arguing over politics you are NOT only not getting to know one another, but you may also end the date with a negative feeling.

   

Topics you should try and avoid talking about on a first date:

1. Exes. Don't talk about your ex wife or husband, about the last relationship that crashed and burned, or about how emotionally scarred you are. These are things you should talk about, but later on, not on a first date. 

If you've gone on a lot of online dating site dates, you can share some funny stories if you like. Funny stories are always acceptable, but try and not bring up your whole dating history. Sharing stories about bad dates is a great way to break the ice, but you also don't want to cross that line that will leave your date wondering if they are going to make the list as well. 

2. Politics, religion, or anything taboo. Look, if someone isn't of your religious denomination, or if they hold political opinions different to your own, and if for you that's a deal breaker, find this out ahead of time. After all, you've already been chatting on dating for disabled, find this out before agreeing to go on a date. 

Arguments like this can never end well, so just steer clear of them. 

3. Disability. If you both have the same medical condition or disability, then it is absolutely fine to bring it up. But if your date hasn't talked about it in person, or online, let them bring it up when they're ready to do so. The point of disabled dating sites is to allow you to have everything on the table, but some people still feel uncomfortable discussing the topic, or they would like to bring it up themselves when the feel ready. That is something that should be respected. 

4. Marriage and Kids. The great thing about dating sites is that you may have both listed in your profile that that is something you are looking for. But, you should still not jump the gun! The first few dates are meant so you can feel each other out and see how serious you both are. First you should see if you are even compatible, or for that matter, like each other. 

5. Anything that seems to make your date uncomfortable. Pay attention to the person sitting in front of you! If they seem awkward or tense because of a topic, change it! 

Don't talk about things that are taboo, elegantly change the subject if your dates looks uncomfortable, and you should be fine. Just get out of your head and focus on your date! If they look like they are enjoying the conversation, and having fun, they probably are! 

For more online dating advice visit our site: http://www.dating4disabled.com/pages/74

What Should You Wear On a First Date?

For years and years we've been debating this question: "I've got a first date tonight, what should I wear?" Men and women alike, we are constantly arguing this seemingly simple question that causes an unusual amount of pre-date stress. Here is Dating 4 Disabled's advice on what you should wear for your first date:

1. Don't overdo it. You're not going to a wedding, you're going to get a cup of coffee with someone. Don't go out and spend money on new clothes (unless you happen to need them). Going on first dates can be expensive enough as is, without wasting money on things you don't need.

2. Wear clean clothes. Go home, shower, shave, and change. You shouldn't show up to a first date all hot and sweaty! Go home and put on something clean and freshly laundered.

3. Wear something nice. Wear something that complements you, and you feel comfortable in. You shouldn't overdo it, but dressing a little nicer than you usually would sends the message to your date that you care. You cared enough about meeting them to put some thought into your clothes.

4. Don't wear anything too revealing. This is for men and women alike.

5. Wear an outfit that makes you feel confident. Put something on that you feel great in. This is because confidence is a great look for a first date!

If you show up looking clean and presentable, that's perfectly alright for a first date! Don't get worked up about it, don't go out and buy new clothes, and don't over-dress. If you stick to that you will be fine.

You can find more disabled dating advice on the site, just click here: http://www.dating4disabled.com/pages/74

Are You From the UK?

Do you live in the United Kingdom? If you do, from now on, you can browse Dating for Disabled for UK members more easily. You can click on the link to see only members who live in the UK:
http://dating4disabled.com/user/search/advanced
If you would like to hone in your search even more, go to "search" and then "advance search settings". 

Why You Should Never Add Your Online Dating Flame to Facebook

Social media is a wonderful place to connect with friends and family. What it isn't, and there is a reason for this, is a dating site. Everyone uses FB in a different way, and to talk with different people. Some of us care if our boss sees our drunk bachelor party photos, and some of us don't.
But the bottom line is this, most people don't have everything on their account public, because the truth of the matter is, we do not want perfect strangers to have access to our private information. Where we live, where we work, where we went to collage, and what about those photos you took with your ex and never quite got round to deleting. There is so much personal information on FB that probably hadn't even occurred to you was on there.
Using FB as an online dating service, or adding someone you just started talking to on an online dating service on FB is a mistake. Primarily, because it's just not safe. You are essentially giving a stranger access to personal information.
On an online matchmaking service, you can control the information. You decide if to post your real name, your photo. It's your choice what you allow other people to see. On FB, you don't have that degree of control, and you probably don't want to have to worry about every little thing you post on your wall. Let alone going through years of photos and comments to check if there is anything embarrassing on there.
It's enough that your aunt Betty posts something along the lines of: "can't wait to see you tonight at  Delino's for Fred's BD!" And now a complete stranger knows where you're going to be. It's not safe, and it's not advisable.

If you've been on a few dates with someone, and things are moving in the right direction, then add them to FB. But if you are someone who guards their privacy, you should think twice about about approving people you just started chatting too.

Whether or not you are using dating for disabled, or another online dating, or disability dating service, the argument stands. Use a proper dating site to meet new people, simply because that way you are in full control over the information you decide to share. 

If you would like to read more about online safety, please go to Dating for Disabled's safety guide:
http://www.dating4disabled.com/pages/4

How Long Should You Wait Before Calling After a First Date?

You've been on a first date with another dating for disabled member and now you’re wondering how long you should I wait to call, text or, message them on the site. Here are some easy tips that might make your life a little easier in this regard:

1. Don’t over think it too much. If you both had a good time and it feels right, text them when you get back: that you had a great time and you would love to do it again sometime soon!

Cynics may claim that it will make you seem too keen. But at the end of the day, you are putting your cards on the table, you are telling your date that you enjoyed yourself and would like to do it again. Hopefully, this will encourage them to do the same. The added benefit here, is now you both know where things stand and you can save hours of wondering whether or not they also had fun.

2. Wait a couple of days to actually call. You've already reassured them that you had a wonderful time on the date, and that you would like to see them again, so they know where things stand. But you still want to take things slowly- so pace yourself before calling.

Don't wait more that that, you don't want to give them the impression you weren't interested in them, or that you're playing games. 

3. Phoning and texting should be like a face to face conversation. Ideally, It should look like tennis; you call they call, you text they text. This isn't playing games, this is just being polite and not overwhelming each-other with texts and phone calls. Don't feel guilty for taking things slowly in the beginning.

That said, it’s OK to break the pattern from time to time. Just because you were the last to text doesn't mean you can't text them.

4. Keep the conversations short and sweet, you are still at the beginning, and might not have tons of things to talk about, and you don't want the conversation to be full of silent pauses. Plus, you want to have enough small talk left for a second date. Despite this, if you find yourself talking for ages, and the conversation just flows, that’s wonderful too! But if things don’t go smoothly, try not to worry about it too much, it usually takes a little time to get used to each other, and feel comfortable.

5. Don’t arrange to meet again right away, wait a few days between dates, take things slowly!

6. Don’t delete your dating for disabled profile just yet. You still don’t know where things are going, so don’t get ahead of yourself and close down your account.

If you're not a dating for disabled member yet, you can click here to register for free: http://www.dating4disabled.com/sign_up

Knowing What you Want- The First Rule of Online Dating

The most important tip I can give new Dating for Disabled users is know what you want! Now, you're probably thinking "of course I know what I want!". But the real question is: do you? Do you know what you want: are you looking for a casual relationship or a serious one? Would you be happy doing long distance for a while if you meet someone who lives far away? Are you looking to settle down and have a dozen kids and adopt a dog named Fred? These are all questions you need to ask yourself before filling out your online dating profile, because they are going to effect your whole "online-dating strategy" and the way you use a dating site.

If you don't know what it is you want, you may end up only talking to people who want to flirt, or who are looking for something casual. Now, this is fine if that's good for you. But if you signed up to a disability online matchmaking service to find a serious relationship, that just won't do.

The "looking for" section on your profile is a personal ad, and you should treat it as such. It tells people what you are looking for, and who should apply. And by apply, I mean send you a privet message. By not filling this out, or by being afraid to put out there what you want, you are sending the wrong message. You are telling people that you don't have a game-plan.

Articulating what kind of person you would like to date, and how serious you would like for them to be, sends a clear message that you're not looking for a casual fling and you don't want to mess around. If you are on online dating to be serious and settle down, and are looking for something long-term, make sure that is what you are advertising to other dating for disabled members.

So often you hear: "I've signed up for a dating site and can't seem to find anyone serious!" If you want to meet someone that is serious, you have to make a point of stating that that's what you are looking for. It all starts that moment when you fill out your profile for the first time, make sure you are clear, because that is the only way you are going to meet "the right kind of people" (for you).

What is So Unique About Dating for Disabled?

Happy Mother's Day from Dating for Disabled

Wishing you guys a very happy mother's day from Dating 4 Disabled!

How to Tell if a Profile is Fake- Online Dating

Whether you are new to Dating for Disabled, or have been using it for ages, you may not know how to spot if a profile is fake, or what to do if you suspect it is. Here are some tips that will help you decide if a profile is real or not, and how to "report" a profile that isn't genuine. The most important aspect of online dating is that you stay safe when using the site. More safety tips for online disabled dating here: http://www.dating4disabled.com/pages/4

How to spot a fake online dating profile:

1. Bad English and Grammar (unless their profile specifically states that they were not born in an English speaking country, or have a learning disability; don't forget that many people with learning disabilities use dating for disabled).

2. Photos that look like they were taken from a magazine
If a photo looks too professional it probably is.

3. The info in the profile doesn't add up. There are a ton of inconsistencies and mistakes. The user stated they have long brown hair but have also written they are bald (and so on). This also requires of you to carefully read through their profile.

4. Their height and weight don't match up. If the member stated that they are quite tall, but their weight just doesn't make sense- report them and we will look into it for you.




5. The users message and profile sound too generic. They made no effort to personalize anything, for example: they sent you a really long message but in no way is it personalized.

Tip: you can copy-paste their "about me" section into a google search and see if one of the spammer data-bases recognizes them.

6. Their online dating profile is empty. If you seen an empty profile just don't message them, period!

7.  Did their message ask for personal information? Did they ask you to donate money or give them money? This is not OK! Report them at once so they can be removed. 

If you found a profile you believe to be a fake it's really easy to report them! (Don't worry, Dating for Disabled won't remove them without an investigation first). Just go to their profile, scroll down to the bottom, and click the "report abuse" button:

Or you can use the contact form on the site (just make sure to copy down their user-name/ID so we know who to look for): http://www.dating4disabled.com/pages/5

Please don't hesitate to report any kind of suspicious activity!

Have you Signed up for Dating4Disabled yet?

Dating for Disabled is an online matchmaking service for people with disabilities. Registration is free and easy! So just go over to the site and sign up: http://www.dating4disabled.com/

Things You Shouldn't Do on a First Date

You've hurdled the challenges of: choosing a dating site, filling out your profile, searching for a match and starting up a conversation! Awesome! Now, the tricky part- the first date. 

If you've arranged to meet another dating for disabled member in real life, here are some useful tips that will help you navigate your first date. Or more specifically, things you should under no circumstance do if you would like it to be successful:

1. Pick a really expensive restaurant. Whether or not you're on disability, most people don't have the budget to go on a lot of first dates, because it starts getting really expensive. Pick a coffee shop, and stick to a cup of coffee and maybe a bun. You don't really know how much your date can afford, so stick to simple and cheap.

2. Invite them over to your place. Never give anyone your address, arrange to meet in a public place. Read more on safety tips for online dating here: http://admind4d.blogspot.co.il/2014/04/how-to-stay-safe-when-using-online.html
You can also go to Dating for Disabled to read the safety rules: http://www.dating4disabled.com/pages/4

3. Pick a venue that isn't wheelchair accessible. Many of our members on dating for disabled are wheelchair users, or have a mobility challenge. If your date is a wheelchair user, make sure to phone ahead to make sure the venue is accessible.

4. Be really really nervous. Do something fun to unwind before the date: watch your favorite TV show, call your mum or eat half a pint of ice-cream in the tub; just do something you know calms you down. Most of us get a little nervous before a date, so it's important to find something you know will relax you.

5. Stand someone up or leave abruptly. Look, sometimes the person you got to know online isn't quite like the person that showed up at the restaurant. Sometimes, there just isn't any chemistry, and that's OK! Sitting and having a cup of coffee costs you an hour of your life, and four bucks. So don't scar someone by putting them off online-dating just because they aren't exactly what you were expecting. And who knows, you might even be pleasantly surprised.

6. Not offer to pay. You don't have to offer to pick up the tab if you don't want to, but you should at least offer to pay your half of it.

7. Come with expectation. Don't expect anything, don't expect the date to be amazing, don't expect a second date, don't expect them to invite you back to their place, don't expect to be kissed, don't expect that they are "the one." If you build up the date too much in your mind, you can end up being REALLY disappointed. Just show up looking forward to having a beverage with a new person you met online.

Don't get ahead of yourselves, just enjoy the moment. 

8. Play with your phone or keep staring down at it. It's just disrespectful, you can afford to put it on silent for an hour, and devote your attention to the person sitting in front of you. Some of us just look at our phones out of habit-fight that habit!

9. Get drunk. It's OK to go out for a beer on a first date, just don't get drunk.

10. Be late. Being late is just a sign you don't respect someone else's time. Try and make it on time, and if you do end up running late, make sure to call and let them know (and don't forget to apologize).

11. Don't let the other person get a word in/only let them talk: a first date should be a conversation, take it in turn to speak and ask questions.

12. Talk about: politics, your ex or anything else controversial. The objective is to get to know your date, not get into an argument, or make them feel uncomfortable.
If they have a disability or medical condition, don't bring it up, let them talk about it when they feel comfortable doing so. Unless of course, you have the same disability, and have already talked about it online, in which case, go for it.

13. Bring along a chaperon. The only time it's acceptable to bring someone else along is if you've agreed upon a double-date ahead of time. If you have a caregiver, or driver, ask them nicely sit on the other side of the restaurant and read a book.

Feel free to post your thoughts in the comments section, and if you have any questions please don't hesitate to email me at: office@dating4disabled.com, or use the site's contact sheet: http://www.dating4disabled.com/pages/5

Things that Will Minimize your Online-Dating Chances

There are a lot of things you can do right when it comes to online dating, but there are also thing you can do wrong that will minimize your chances of meeting someone when using a dating site. If you're a dating for disabled member, here are some things you should NOT be doing if you would like to find a partner on Dating4Disabled: 


1. Leave your profile empty and photo-less. If you would like to meet another member to date, you will have to make the minimal effort of filling out your profile. Adding a picture will also greatly improve your chances of meeting someone.

Read more on how to fill out your online dating profile: http://admind4d.blogspot.co.il/2014/04/how-to-fill-out-your-online-dating.html

2. Send generic messages like: "hi!" or "wasup?". 
Make sure to personalize your messages and ask questions.

3. Be sexually explicit on your profile/user name. This will reduce your chances of other D4D members messaging you.

4. Fill out your "looking for" section of your profile with a list of things you DON'T want. If you would like people to respond to you, you need to keep your profile language positive. Instead of writing lots of things you don't want, write what you DO want, and who you WOULD like to meet.

5. Comment on people's physical appearance (even if it is a compliment). It makes people feel uncomfortable and self conscious, so avoid compliments about how they look.
This doesn't mean you shouldn't compliment them, just stick to things like: "I see your favorite book is Fifty Shades of Grey, you have excellent taste in literature".

6. Be disrespectful in anyway to another member about their: disability, appearance, personality, or something they posted or shared. Dating 4 Disabled is a community with blogs and forums that members use to share their thoughts, and like on any site, trolls are not tolerated!

7. Send angry messages to people who didn't reply to yours. Part of online dating is understanding that for a variety of different reasons people aren't always going to reply to a message you sent them. Maybe they left the site, or have already found someone and forgot to change their relationship status, and maybe they just aren't interested. Either way, if someone doesn't reply, just forget about them and move on.

8. Lying about your appearance, occupation, disability or anything else. You may rationalize lying as 'something everyone does on internet dating sites', but the flaw in the plan is: if you do end up meeting someone you genuinely like, it may end up backfiring on you. Possibly because you will be too embarrassed to meet up with them, or worry they will reject you when they realize you lied. You can decide to be selective about what information you put on your profile, but don't post things that aren't true.

9. Refuse to ever be the first one to message another member. If you want to meet other members on a disability matchmaking website, you're going to have to make the effort to message them. You can't just sit around and hope someone contacts you, it's time to be proactive.

Being proactive about the whole process will also raise your chances of finding someone who fits your criteria of what you're looking for!  

Why Use Online Dating?

If you've never used an online matchmaking service, or a disabled matchmaking service, you may be constantly asking yourself the same question: why even go there? "I would rather just meet someone in real-life"!  The problem with that statement is that sometimes, you just aren't meeting people. Or more importantly, you aren't meeting the right kind of people.

Whether you have a disability or not, you just may be picking the wrong kind of people to go out with. Dating for Disabled is a disability matchmaking service that allows you to put together a "shopping list" of things you are looking for in a partner. You can sit down in the comfort of your own kitchen, and put together a list of things that you would like in someone you intend to date. It can be as thorough or as superficial as you like, just take a seat, and write it all down on a piece of paper. Once you've got an outline in your head of what YOU are looking for, start the computer and sign up for a disabled dating site. The real challenge, is making that list! It's knowing before signing up, what it is that you want and need. Now, fill out your online dating profile (for more tips about that click here: http://admind4d.blogspot.co.il/2014/04/how-to-fill-out-your-online-dating.html ).

An online dating site allows you to hold up a virtual sign that announces what you want, and what kind of person it is you are searching to meet. In real life, it takes much longer to weed out the people who aren't really serious about a relationship, online they just write it on their profile.

Whilst filling out your profile, make sure to complete the "looking for" section. This will allow you to explain what kind of members you would like to contact you. Don't forget to fill out what kind of disability you have, and if you have a mobility challenge, or are in need of assistance. When you sign up for a dating site you don't have to put down any information you aren't comfortable sharing, but you should consider that if you are signing up for a dating site that is specifically for people with disabilities, there is no need to wait till later to tell someone about your disability. Part of the reason people choose Dating for Disabled, is that they know that they can be upfront and honest about it.

Now, you can't just sit around and be passive! With online dating, you can't just expect the perfect person to message you. You have to go out there, and use that list of criteria you yourself picked out, to hunt them down and message them. If you want a relationship, you're going to have to work for it, and by work for it, I mean: sign up for a dating site, fill out a profile, and use the search-tools to find someone who you're interested in getting to know a little better.

The beauty of online dating is that it's all up to you. You decide what you're looking for, and you go out there and message those people! That isn't to say people aren't going to message you first, or not message you back. 

But it's taking a hands-on approach to the whole mate-finding process. 

Who Uses an Online Disabled Matchmaking Service- And is it a Good Fit For You?

Dating for Disabled is an online matchmaking service for disabled singles. If you have a disability or a medical condition and feel awkward about going out on dates because you feel self conscious about it, this is the site for you. On Dating 4 Disabled you will find other singles with disabilities who are also looking for love or friendship.
The reason people join our site is because on the large dating sites they feel that at some point they will need to "disclose" the fact they have a disability, and aren't sure if they should be upfront about it, because then they will have trouble finding a date. Or maybe they should wait till later, but that can entail a fear of rejection. After all, the biggest deterrent from daring, online and offline, is fear of rejection when you out yourself out there. This is hard enough as is, without the added fear of being rejected because of a disability. The unique benefit of Dating for disabled, is that everything is out in the open as far as mobility and medical history are concerned. You don't need to worry about someone finding out you have a medical condition because you list in on your profile, and everyone else on the site too has a medical, or mobility problem, so they too will understand you better. If you shy away from using dating sites for just this reason, then dating 4 disabled will be a good fit for you to meet other singles with disabilities. You can register for free, open a profile, message other members, and use our blogs and forums. We stopped being just a dating site years ago, now the site has become a community of people with disabilities, who log in to connect, share and meet other people.
Using the site is a simple and easy way to meet other singles who are also looking for a relationship.
If you are having any trouble signing up, or filling out your D4D profile, please feel free to email me (dating for disabled's admin): office@dating4disabled.com


We suggest that all new members go through our online dating safety guidelines, before starting to chat with other dating for disabled members.